The Daily Mash   Humour

A FAMILY have spent the Easter holidays giving their National Trust cards an absolute fucking hammering. Go to full article
Published: 21st April 2017 - 10.10 am
Source: The Daily Mash



The Daily Mash
Humour
Poll reveals no-one has ever met anyone who has taken part in a poll
30th April 2017 - 8.08 am
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Man thinks playing guitar makes up for his awful personality 

30th April 2017 - 8.11 am
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Man cuts all contact with mother after discovering she likes ‘Galway Girl’
29th April 2017 - 10.55 am
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UK to be rebranded as massive branch of Costa
29th April 2017 - 8.30 am
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May admits she got ‘strong and stable’ from leaflet about erectile dysfunction
28th April 2017 - 4.07 pm
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Original velociraptors to return for Jurassic World 2
28th April 2017 - 10.12 am
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Tonight the perfect night to do E, confirm doctors
28th April 2017 - 11.01 am
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Woman who just created whole new human couldn’t give a shit about her weight
28th April 2017 - 11.31 am
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Fat, balding office manager believes we need a good war
28th April 2017 - 8.06 am
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May urged to call even earlier election
28th April 2017 - 8.44 am
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Old fiver is ticking time bomb
28th April 2017 - 7.45 am
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Ghost of Blair ordered to piss off back to netherworld
27th April 2017 - 12.00 pm
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Agony Aunt: Dear Boris, Under no circumstances should you call someone a ‘fannybadger’
27th April 2017 - 10.29 am
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Woman never realised musicals were that shit
27th April 2017 - 10.46 am
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The f**k is a mugwump? asks Corbyn
27th April 2017 - 8.06 am
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May considering bringing back workhouses for a laugh
27th April 2017 - 8.20 am
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Crazy bastard ignores warning about email having no subject
27th April 2017 - 8.54 am
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The Daily Mash
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Beat me harder this time, begs Goldsmith
27th April 2017 - 9.30 am
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The Daily Mash
Humour
New app shows Londoners what it would be like to own a house
26th April 2017 - 10.32 am
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The Daily Mash
Humour
Man launches dream career of showing people his arse
26th April 2017 - 11.31 am
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The Daily Mash
Humour
Incredible success of Newcastle and West Ham explained
26th April 2017 - 11.51 am
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Blue Riband is the traitor’s biscuit, say Brexiters
26th April 2017 - 8.53 am
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Humour
Tim Farron: I do not hate ‘the gays’
26th April 2017 - 9.43 am
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Humour
UK could have driverless government by 2020, say experts
26th April 2017 - 7.42 am
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Woman shunned by friends after asking for low-key hen do
26th April 2017 - 8.01 am
Source: The Daily Mash
The Onion
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The Onion Looks Back At The First 100 Days And 10 Plagues Of The Trump Administration
29th April 2017 - 4.24 pm
Source: The Onion
The Onion
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OJ Simpson Announces Bills Second Round Draft Pick
28th April 2017 - 11.01 pm
Source: The Onion
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Your Latest Fuckup That Has Everybody Talking
28th April 2017 - 9.07 pm
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Scientists Constructing Bricks From Simulated Martian Soil
28th April 2017 - 8.08 pm
Source: The Onion
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Retired Ice Rink Manager Recalls Days Of Horse-Led Zambonis
28th April 2017 - 6.21 pm
Source: The Onion
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David Crosby Shows Photo Of Dwarven Blacksmith To Barber To Give Idea Of What He Wants
28th April 2017 - 4.05 pm
Source: The Onion
The Onion
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Fetal Lambs Kept Alive Inside Artificial Uterus
28th April 2017 - 3.17 pm
Source: The Onion
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Man Who'€™s Only Halfway Through Life Can Already Guess How It'€™s Going To End
28th April 2017 - 3.01 pm
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Super 8 Offering Writers Residency For Anyone Working On Suicide Note
28th April 2017 - 2.24 pm
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Man Who Should Have Stayed In School Stuck In Cleveland
28th April 2017 - 12.15 am
Source: The Onion
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Cracking Sound Alerts Man He Reaching Styrofoam Plate'€™s Weight Limit
27th April 2017 - 8.26 pm
Source: The Onion
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Chobani Sues Alex Jones For Defamation
27th April 2017 - 8.21 pm
Source: The Onion
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Mark Zuckerberg Touts Complete Lack Of Cannibalism On Facebook Live So Far
27th April 2017 - 6.44 pm
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Ecuadorian Officials Starting To Get Sick Of Julian Assange Always Leaving Dirty Dishes All Over Embassy
27th April 2017 - 4.54 pm
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Justin Trudeau Unveils Plan To Meet Healthcare Needs Of Canada'€™s Aging Prog Rockers
27th April 2017 - 3.59 pm
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Notable Commencement Speakers For The Class Of 2017
27th April 2017 - 1.46 pm
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Area Man Convinced He Could Have Been NFL Bust
27th April 2017 - 1.43 pm
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Plastic-Eating Caterpillar Discovered
27th April 2017 - 1.25 pm
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Department Of Interior Asks For Resignation Of Obama-Era Elk
27th April 2017 - 1.07 pm
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NHL Finally Welds Handle To Stanley Cup
27th April 2017 - 1.09 pm
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Chemicals That Pushed Man'€™s Ancestors To Run Down Wild Boar Flare At Sight Of White Cheddar Popcorn Bag
27th April 2017 - 1.10 pm
Source: The Onion
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Nation'€™s Sanitation Workers Announce Everything Finally Clean
27th April 2017 - 1.05 pm
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How Technology Will Change Travel
26th April 2017 - 9.59 pm
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Raiders Agree To Pay Fan Base $16 Billion In Relocation Expenses
26th April 2017 - 8.55 pm
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Hospital Denies Teen'€™s Transplant Due To Marijuana Use
26th April 2017 - 8.29 pm
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Cracked
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6 Personal Secrets Filmmakers Hid In Famous Movies
16th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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4 Public Safety Scares With Hilarious Punch Lines
16th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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The Most Important Things You Need To Know On Thursday 2/16
16th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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So You've Effed Up Your Life, Here's How To Fix It
16th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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Hey, Harrison Ford, About These Planes...
16th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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15 Characters Who Missed The Point Of Their Own Franchise
16th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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Too Much Too Soon? A Critique Of The Trump Show
16th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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Detroiters: The Madmen of Detroit Public Access
14th February 2017 - 4.28 pm
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5 Insane Historical Theories That Make Way Too Much Sense
15th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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5 WTF Mass Panics You Never Learned About In History Class
15th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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5 Dumb Things You Will Do When You Buy A Professional Camera
15th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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The Stupidity Of That Motivation Video People Keep Sharing
15th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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The Skeeviest Things I Saw Working At An Adult Movie Theater
15th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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22 Tips That Will Keep You Safe In The Modern World
15th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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Why Speed Dating Is Terrible
15th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (2/14/17)
14th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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How Dumbass Memes Turned Into Modern Propaganda
14th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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5 Ridiculous (But Wonderful) Ways Movies Used To Be Promoted
14th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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12 Bad Valentine Cards For The Political News Junkie
14th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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Long-Term BDSM Relationships: What 50 Shades Darker Ignores
14th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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6 Most Blatant Lies Brands Put In Ads
14th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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The Sheer Madness That Was The Star Wars Horror Book Series
11th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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5 Times The Studio Actually Knew What Was Best For The Movie
11th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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9 Hard Truths Trump Wishes He Knew Before Becoming President
11th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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The Bizarre World Of The Pro Anorexia Internet Community
11th February 2017 - 4.00 am
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News Thump
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Facebook Friend really bloody loves blossom
30th April 2017 - 12.05 pm
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News Thump
Humour
Being poor is like the Fyre festival but all the time, rich people told
28th April 2017 - 7.40 pm
Source: News Thump
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Garden Bridge project to be scrapped and replaced with Lego
28th April 2017 - 1.16 pm
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If I was that bothered about men bumming each other, I’d have put it in a commandment, insists God
28th April 2017 - 11.17 am
Source: News Thump
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New Tory slogan ‘We’re going to f**king kill you all’ not putting people off
28th April 2017 - 10.05 am
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President Trump congratulated after getting to 100 days without grabbing anyone by the pussy
28th April 2017 - 9.27 am
Source: News Thump
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Stoke-on-Trent electorate granted restraining order against Paul Nuttall
28th April 2017 - 8.50 am
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Theresa May ejected from McDonald's after repeated ‘strong, stable leadership’ responses jam drive-thru
28th April 2017 - 8.32 am
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Conservatives will increase employment of made up words if elected, promises Boris Johnson
27th April 2017 - 1.50 pm
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Trump tax cuts will be covered by Mexico paying the entire US budget, pledges White House
27th April 2017 - 12.15 pm
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United Airlines could be budding serial killer
27th April 2017 - 11.57 am
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Jeremy Corbyn declines open goal
27th April 2017 - 11.43 am
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Children of vegetarians 'overjoyed' as UK suffers hummus shortage
27th April 2017 - 9.46 am
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Ministry of Magic criticises Boris Johnson for calling Corbyn a 'muggle'
27th April 2017 - 9.22 am
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'Bland, inoffensive yet meaningless slogan,' says Theresa May
27th April 2017 - 9.09 am
Source: News Thump
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Warmaster Horus to stand as 'anti-Establishment' candidate in election
26th April 2017 - 6.03 pm
Source: News Thump
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Gambling 'bad' insists organisation running a sport that would be broke without it
26th April 2017 - 4.27 pm
Source: News Thump
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Humour
Man who hasn't washed determined to sit next to you on the bus
26th April 2017 - 12.08 pm
Source: News Thump
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Humour
West Ham and Newcastle United raided by police after fraudulently claiming to be 'football teams'
26th April 2017 - 11.03 am
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Humour
Nestle 'take back control' by sending hundreds of jobs to Europe
26th April 2017 - 10.54 am
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Humour
Please don't look at my voting record on gay rights, pleads vicars daughter
26th April 2017 - 9.48 am
Source: News Thump
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Humour
Tim Farron also fine with light S&M, mutual masturbation, and threesomes
26th April 2017 - 9.27 am
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Humour
Wetherspoons ban customers for not swearing enough
25th April 2017 - 5.13 pm
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Humour
Swoonings up 220% as Tom Hardy arrests a thief with his bare hands
25th April 2017 - 4.18 pm
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Humour
Shoplifters delighted by return of Woolworths
25th April 2017 - 11.38 am
Source: News Thump